A transgender individual identified as Robin/Robert Westman confessed in handwritten journals that he was “tired of being trans” and expressed regret over his gender transition before carrying out a deadly attack at a Minneapolis church. The writings, shared online prior to the violence, included references to self-loathing, violent fantasies, and suicidal ideation.

Westman’s journal entries reportedly described his frustration with his appearance, stating, “I only keep [the long hair] because it is pretty much my last shred of being trans. I am tired of being trans, I wish I never brain-washed myself.” He also mentioned plans to cut his hair on the day of an attack, which he later carried out at Annunciation Catholic Church and School. The assault resulted in two children killed and 17 others injured before Westman took his own life.

The journal excerpts revealed disturbing themes, including violent fantasies about harming children and admiration for the Sandy Hook massacre. Westman also wrote phrases such as “kill Donald Trump” and “for the children” on gun magazines. His writings further detailed a struggle with identity, noting, “I don’t want to dress girly all the time but I guess sometimes I really like it. I know I am not a woman but I definitely don’t feel like a man.”

Westman had previously petitioned to change his name from Robert to Robin in 2020, citing his identification as female. However, his later writings suggested a rejection of this identity. A suicide note attributed to him expressed deep despair, blaming societal pressures and personal anguish for his actions. It included apologies to family members and a plea for them to move on after the tragedy.

The text also referenced Westman’s alleged health struggles, including claims of self-inflicted cancer from vaping and other habits, though no medical evidence was provided. The note concluded with a call for forgiveness and a statement that “the world needs more love.”

This account is based on reported journal entries and suicide notes attributed to the individual, as shared by unnamed sources.